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Ask for help > Help:Tutor-to-Teacher harassment
Help:Tutor-to-Teacher harassment
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carinita
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Help:Tutor-to-Teacher harassment
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Hi, guys
This is rather personal.
I �m writing about this here because a lot of teachers with experience usually take a look at this site and....I �m sure some will be willing to give me their point of view
At the moment, I �m working in 3 schools but 7 months ago I only had one replacement in one school In that school I met-6 months ago - a tutor (There are two tutors in charge of my course: a man and a woman)
The man asked me out. At that moment, I felt confused, surprised...weird!!! but I knew that I didn �t like him ( I was a 100% sure) so in a very friendly manner I told him "Oh, you know...I �m not ready to go out as a couple. I haven �t overcome my last break up yet We wouldn �t have fun now. Perhaps we can go out with other co-workers, as a group We can be friends Time will tell"
His answer was "Don �t worry! It was only a suggestion"
After that, I tried to avoid being alone with him He was distant I was distant
Today all the teachers in the school have to hand in a list with the marks of the students at "his" office...(there are other employees in the same office anyway)
Going back to today...we had to add the information of each course (I only had one course) to a kind of record.
The room was FUUUULLLL of people And from one moment to another -all the ppl around - he started making fun of my lips, protruding his own lips. The second time he did that I replied with an ugly face  Anyway every little now and then he stared at me in an insinuating way
I wear conservative clothes Usually I wear jeans but I take care the shirt is suficiently long when it is so I �m not the kind of girl you HARASS!!! I feel humilliated, denigrated, dirt.
Now I �m on holidays. My replacement finishes in February. What if the previous teacher don �t want to come back and I have to continue working there?? Who should I talk about this issue with?
P.S. I know my last question is ungrammatical but I�m not able to fix it  |
18 Dec 2010
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EiriniK
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Dear Carinita,
To begin with, you have nothing to be ashamed of because you have done nothing wrong. You are not the one who should feel bad. If I were in your shoes, I �d report him to whom ever is in charge at this school. Perhaps he has done it before.
The reason he felt he had to insult you is because he was rejected by you. You shouldn �t be intimidated by his unacceptable behaviour. Stand up for yourself!
I wish you luck!  |
18 Dec 2010
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carinita
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Should I report this right now? There �s only a meeting next tuesday and then holidays begin |
18 Dec 2010
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EiriniK
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Yes, I think it �s best that you do it right away. Don �t let this bug you throughout your holiday. Get it out of the way so that you have one less thing to worry about. You should look forward to going back to work - not fear it. |
18 Dec 2010
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aliciapc
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Hi, carinita, I couldn �t agree more with what Eirinik has suggested. No doubt, take action next tuesday, talk to whoever is in charge. Hope you talk to a different kind of person, who �s fair and objective. Keep us posted! |
18 Dec 2010
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labou
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hi dear!
well your story is not something new; you know,women are all the time prone to harrassement. This guy is trivial and irrespectable and he wants you to give in one way or another, even by insulting you! He is playing on your nerves and I guess he is used to that behaviour and to women �s submission to him, the reason why he couldn �t accept your rejection.You are different from the others that �s the point and this is why he �s trying to annoy you.So just ignore him.I suggest you inform your school administration. So don �t worry, these things happen a lot.Wish you good luck!
Ines
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18 Dec 2010
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carinita
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I feel much relieved after writing this post... I could write a book about my experiences now... I �m almost sure anyone here could publish a book and be rich 
I�ll keep you posted. Sure! |
18 Dec 2010
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reeta1
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Oh, definitely report it, insist that you have a meeting with him and your supervisor, and pursue it after the holidays. Because you may have to continue to work with this person or not, but if he does it to you, he �ll do it to someone else. Also, inform your supervisor that you will be taking it to an even higher authority if the situation is not dealt with to your satisfaction. If you don �t stand up for yourself now, what will you do if it happens to you at another school? |
18 Dec 2010
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carinita
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Wow! I don �t know ... You�re totally right but I �m afraid this is kind of a snowball I don �t think he is the kind of person that is submissive. He will retaliate. I�ll inform school authorities but I was thinking about quitting next year I live in Argentina Canada is like 10 years ahead in what legislation is concerned |
18 Dec 2010
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Gise09
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Hola Carinita!
Te escribo en Castellano porque tambi�n soy de Argentina! Me indignan este tipo de situaciones que muchas mujeres tienen que pasar. Te recomiendo que informes al director/a o rector/a, y si con eso no es suficiente and� a la departamental o al Consejo si es necesario! Pero esto no debe quedar as�! Como dijeron en otros comentarios, tal vez no sos la primera (ni la �ltima) que ha sufrido esta falta de respeto por esa persona, y si nadie hace nada puede seguir con su mala conducta hacia otras docentes.
Deseo que alguien te escuche, alguien con autoridad para que pueda solucionarte este inconveniente. Mucha suerte! y no dejes que esta persona arruine tu trabajo!
Nos vemos...
Gisela |
18 Dec 2010
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cacucacu
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Carinita Hi! I agree with all our friends that you should report what happened to the authorities, but I also know that men usually behave like this because We (women) don �t do anything. What I mean is that you should also bother him wittly, whenever he tells you something. For example if he tells you somethings about you lips you can tell him something that " It �s a pity you �ll never watch them closely, or Be sure they �ll never be yours" I had a similar problem a long time ago an older collegue told me to "answer back" and it worked. Always remember you are a lady after all so don�t use insults or dirty words, just a witty answer. I wish you all the best! And please never give up! You have the same right to work there as he has! Love NAty
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18 Dec 2010
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