anecdotes 9 SHORT FUNNY STORIES -on 3 pages worksheet

Little funny stories. Both for e*d*u*l*t*s and kids. Present Simple vs Past siple. There are also examples of pr.cont. pr.perfect . Exaple: God and the man A man visits God and says "God, do you mind if I ask you a few questions?" God says "No, ask me anything at all." So the man says "God, you´ve been around for a very long time, so, for you, how long is a thousand years?" God replies "For me, a thousand years is only five minutes." The man then says "That´s interesting God. And, for you, how much is a million dollars?" God replies "For me, a million dollars is only five cents." The man says "Really? Well then God, could you lend me five cents please?" God looks at the man, smiles, and says "Of course my son. Just wait five minutes!" In the classroom A teacher said, "Mary, I´d like you to give me a sentence beginning with ´I´, please." Mary thought for a few seconds and then said, "I is..." The teacher interupted her and said, "No Mary, you cannot begin a sentence with ´I is´ - you must use ´I am´." Mary looked upset and said, "But Miss..." The teacher shouted, "Give me a sentence beginning with ´I am´, please." Mary shrugged her shoulders and said, "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." Supermarket A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The supermarket manager greeted him with a smile and a handshake, and then gave him a brush, saying "Welcome to Smith´s Supermarkets. Here is a brush - your first job is to sweep the floor." The young man looked amazed and said, "But I´m a university graduate." The manager then said, "Oh, I´m sorry. I didn´t realise that you are a university graduate. Give me the brush and I´ll show you how to do it."

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