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Message board > Expats from all over the world!
Expats from all over the world!
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Mariethe House
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Expats from all over the world!
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SO many natives here are expatriated. I guess it is quite understandable but I am very curious to know , when I see all the different places you have chosen to live in, I am curious to know what made you decide to go there and leave your country.DO you never regret it? Will you one day go back? what makes you want to go from one place to another? Lots of questions I ask myself when I see your avatars. How do you like it? what are the pros and cons?
WOuld you be willilng to share some experiences with us, more sedentary people?
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26 Jul 2011
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juliag
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Well hello my dear Mariethe, sorry it has been such a long time. Always too busy these days. I hope you, Gerard, your Charlotte and the other people around you are all well and that you are enjoying your summer.
Seeing that no one else has yet answered your post made me want to all the more, but please excuse me if my answer is a little rushed and so may not be as well thought-out as it could be and will almost certainly have some typos and missing punctuation etc.
I don �t ever think of myself as an expat, though by this definition on google I guess I am:
expat - a person who is voluntarily absent from home or country
as I have been living here in Japan voluntarily for pretty much exactly 12 years now. As you know, though some others might not, I �m originally from the UK.
It wasn �t really a conscious decision for me to become an expat. When I finished university I wanted to experience life in a country completely different to my own, and seens as I had studied a little of Japanese Noh and Kabuki at university when it cane to a choice between Japan and China I went for Japan. I came out on the JET program which puts assistant English teachers in schools around the country and knew virtually nothing about the country and only a few hastily learned sentences of the language when I came and only ever intended to stay a year or two. I always thought I would return to England and do an MA as my teachers had suggested.
But somehow I just loved (and still do, so love would me more appropriate) living here. I love the dramatic scenery of the Japanese Alps, the fact that so much of the country is covered in greenery, the fact that much of the traditional culture is still alive today, the language with its inherent grace, and most of all the people around me who, where I live in the countryside, are so very sincere and kind (or at least for the most part).
Although I never think of it as missing these things, there are some things (values) that I would love to import from England, so I guess these would be some of what I consider the cons of living here. But there are not many. The biggest one for me is the issue of holidays. Japan is rather a nation of hardworking workaholics, I long for the more relaxed attitude to taking time off work in the West, or at least in the countryside in the West. When I read of how so many of you other teachers are on long summer holidays, although I feel happy for you I am also a tiny bit jealous. Here as a teacher in a conversation school I only get 2 weeks and even the regular teachers only get three weeks. It is even worse for them as if they lead club activities or anything they have to go in to school even during the holidays! I find 2 weeks isn �t even enough time to catch up on all the outstanding little projects, never mind rest and recuperate on top of that. Although I know short holidays aren �t unique to Japan, I think the workaholic attitude is more ingrained here. I find it unbelievable that after 7 years with my wonderful boyfriend, we have never managed more than an overnight trip as he believes that he can �t (shouldn �t) close his (own) shop for more than three or four days at a time because it is bad for business. I would love to travel with him, both more within the country and abroad, but somehow I can �t ever see it happening until he retires, and I �m sure he won �t be doing that til he �s way over 65, so I guess this is just a choice I have to live with and if I want to travel I will have to find the courage to do most of it alone.
I also miss the free concerts in the park etc. kind of events that often take place in the UK but that there are not so much of here. I guess, when it boils down to it I just want to play more!!!
But do not get me wrong, I have wonderful friends and although I don �t do much "playing," as you know I �ve very much taken up with my pottery hobby and this, while keeping me even busier, gives me a wonderful creative release, gives me something to concentrate on that is entirely un-work related and to top it all my teachers (2 brothers in their 60s) are lovely people who I am lucky to count among some of my closest friends, too.
When I first came here to this little village surrounded by tall hills I used to miss the wide open skies of the Norfolk and the sea, which was only a five min walk from my house at home. Now I don �t miss these things so much, though I still love the sea and am always happy when I can see it or smell it or dabble my feet in it. One thing I would like to have would be the long, light summer evenings of the UK. Here it i s usually dark by 7:30 or so.
But these are all very little things and the happiness and joy I have found in living here far outweighs them. So far I have never regretted my decision to stay on, though I know that for some people it loses their charm and they return to their home countries even after living here for 20 years and more. As to me, will I stay or go, I really don �t know. I just live each day and year as it comes and at this time I feel no desire to return home other than for short holidays. As long as things continue to go well with my partner I would imagine I will be staying here for good as he speaks virtually no English. But especially with him being so much older than me I do wonder what I will feel like doing if I am left alone at some point in the future. At that time would I want to go back to the UK? I don �t know. I don �t have much close contact with my friends from home now and depend much more on the ones here. But they are not family and would not be able to support an aging me if it comes to that. On the other hand, I am not overly close to my 2 brothers and am sure they wouldn �t either, and surely it would take time to build up a new network of friends if I was to return home at that kind of age. As you can see, the future holds lots of questions and uncertainties, many of them worrying, but for the moment even with the stress that sometimes comes with living in another country I am happier since I have been living here, and particularly since I have found my partner, than I have ever been in my life before and don �t have any plans to go home in the forseeable future.
Does this answer some of your questions? I hope so, and also that I haven �t been too introspective and depressing. Anyway, I had better get down to some work now but look forward to reading the answers of some other members. Thank you Mariethe for raising such an interesting question and for all your support.
Big hugs  Julia
Edit: I just thought of something else and this IS going to sound a little depressing, I�m afraid. I guess the other thing that I miss would be the celebration of special days. I find that I often find birthdays and Christmas pretty lonely here. Birthdays are not a big thing for adults here, and even though Tadaoki will always make me a meal late on at night after we both finish work and buy me presents being the wonderful guy he is, I miss the attention from other people that I would probably get if I was still at home, it never feels like a really special day, but maybe that is just because I am an adult now and all adults feel that way and most of them don�t mind. Although I am not religious, Christmas can also feel rather lonely as it is not even a holiday here, and to cap it all it is Tadaoki�s busiest time of the year at work and so I never manage to see him to exchange our presents and so on until the 28th or 29th of December. I am lucky enough to have a wonderful American friend in the next village who invites me to spend the day with her and her family and that is always a lovely time, but somehow it feels different from spending it with your own partner. Also the New Year, when my Japanese friends are all celebrating with their families and I am, more often than not, alone. Well, these are only 2 or 3 days in a year, so one can�t complain. And people have good days and bad days, good years and bad years even in their own countries, right? But I wanted to answer your questions honestly and thought of this extra point after I�d written my original response.
Over to someone else now...
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26 Jul 2011
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psd4fan
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I hated my job and life ( or lack thereof) and decided to make a radical change. I came to China in January of 2007 and haven �t looked back. I love my home country dearly and will always be a proud Canadian/ Canuck/ Canucklehead... but I love my life and home here in northeast China. I got married almost a year ago and we plan to always live here. |
26 Jul 2011
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David Lisgo
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Nice topic, thanks to those who shared especially Julia who hasn �t hidden a thing from us. I �m afraid that my own journey seems so personal and fraught with obstacles, so I would rather not go into too much detail.
I �m also originally from England having grew up in Newcastle and then spending almost 9 years in North Yorks in the Royal Air Force before emigrating to South Africa where I worked for Atlas Aircraft Corporation for eight years before moving to Japan. My wife, Yasuko, was with me in South Africa for seven years and we never took much notice of apartheid and it wasn �t part of our daily or social lives but when South Africa began using the military to enforce its unjust laws we decided to move to Japan.
Now when I was in South Africa, I lived in an Afrikaans community and could understand the language quite well and was able to hold a basic conversation in Afrikaans. When I came to Japan I searched for a teacher for about 10 years, as I �m not a person to study a language on my own, but was unable to find anyone because we lived far, and still do, from a city where lessons are easy to obtain. And so I �ve never learned the language, which has been a great help to my children who have all grown up bilingually and to my students, but it �s somewhat sad for me, so I do miss being able to converse with people freely. I �m the only native English speaker who lives permanently in my town and I rarely have the opportunity of speaking with native speakers, I miss that though when I have the opportunity I sometimes find it difficult to keep up with the conversation as after more than 30 years away from an English-speaking society, I find that my speech, and therefore my thought processes, have slowed down a little.
I do miss being able to visit my family in England but with four children and a small English school to run, there is little time and little money for such luxuries. Summer break is usually only one week, though in the winter we can stretch it out for 10 days or so.
Life has been very interesting and my experiences are unlike most people I have known or read about. I am quite "sedentary" as I have been living in the same area, Kagoshima prefecture in the far south of Kyushu Island, since 1986 and have seen very little of Japan as I �m always working. So in that sense it �s not romantic. But for someone with my own educational background and my technical training, it is quite amazing that I am now a school owner, university lecturer and author. These things I could never be in England.
Well I must go as I have classes soon. |
26 Jul 2011
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joy2bill
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I guess I could say I am also an expat as I am a New Zealander living in Australia. I came here when my children grew up and went overseas themselves. For a Kiwi back in 1997 it was so easy to come to Australia and I thought it was a bit of an adventure. I wouldn �t go back now because of the weather. Due to my husband �s disability he needs the dry, warm, sunny days that we have here on the Gold Coast.
We were amazed how many differences there were between Aus & NZ. Things, such as banking are slower and have more red tape here because of the size of the country and the number of states, etc. What I found interesting is that there are four directions here. In NZ it was mainly north and south, east & west meant falling in the water. Ha! Ha!
Coming to Australia cost us an incredible amount of money for several reasons, one of which was being cheated by the owner of a business we bought plus the difference in the exchange rate. We have also lost our daughter who has got involved with an inappropriate relationship but these experiences just make us stronger.
Given the opportunity to try another country (or even another city) go for it! |
26 Jul 2011
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Zora
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Hi dear friend,
I hope all is well with you. I am, as always, busy as a bee for it is summer. However, since it is early and classes don �t start until 930, I have decided to tell you (and everyone) my story and show people what a romantic I am at heart. 
Like many people with a Spanish parent, I ended up back in Spain when I was a young teenager. I finished my schooling in Spain, worked a few years and went back to Canada since I missed my country a lot. (I am a true Canadian at heart, and often have been compared to an American in my patriotism and love of my country by my family.  )
Ironically, while I was in Canada, I fell in love with a Spanish guy and ended up moving back to Spain. Although in the end, it did not work out and during my time with my ex, I decided to open my own business teaching English.
Like Julia, I don �t regret my move. I do however miss of aspects of my country� I miss politeness, I miss orderliness and I miss the friendliness of my country. I find that Canadians tend to be more sincere in their friendship than where I am at the moment. In fact, my parents went back to Canada last year and people that they had not talked to in 20 years, who had found out that they were coming for a visit, called them up and took them out or invited them over to their house to stay for a visit. My parents had forgotten how kind, generous , and generally nice Canadians can be. They were touched beyond belief, and have decided to go back for another visit . Since there were a lot of people that they could not visit because they were only there for such a short time.
Anyways, I am rambling a bit� Sorry about that bad habit ... anyways, in the fall, this little Canadian will be making another life-changing move - I am going to Britain � again because of love. I met a wonderful English gent about a year ago and I have decided to pack it all in here in Spain, and make another jump� Although this time not across an ocean; only a little channel! lol
well I must be going now� My students are here and I need to get down to business.
Big hugs and I hope all is well with your little princess and your wonderful Gerard.
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26 Jul 2011
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amyi
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What an interesting topic! I hope that my experience won �t bore you! I was born in South Wales, GB. I started studying French at school when I was 11 and I LOVED it! I decided then that I would like to live in France. I did a French degree at Southampton Uni and moved to France as soon as I graduated. I worked as an English assistant for 3 years before preparing the CAPES (teaching qualification). I �ve been qualified now for 10 years and I work in a secondary school ( �Ambition R�ussite �). My partner is French and our 2 little boys go to school here (our 3rd baby is due any day now!). I would really like them to experience everyday life in Britain, rather than see it as the country of their grandparents. Perhaps we �ll go and spend a year or two there sometime soon. |
26 Jul 2011
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abba
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I loved reading all your stories, I really enjoyed reading all of them, thanks a lot for sharing such intimate aspects of your life. By the way amyi, the best for your family and that new baby coming. |
26 Jul 2011
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