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ESL forum > Message board > Help needed    

Help needed



Myszka
Poland

Help needed
 
Could you spent a minute to check this text for me and correct any mistakes? Tkanks a lot.
 

Dear Sir/Madam


I am writing in response to the letter of complaint about the holiday company that has been published in your newspaper. As a participant, I am toally opposed to presented view.
To begin with, let me state that I was delighted with the accommodation. In my view, it was not rudimentary or overestaminated, but neat and tidy with endowment needed. Hotel Staff was obliging and I have no cavil. Therefore, I believe that the price was appropriate to the quality.
Although the food was not available at the hotel, it gave me great opportunity to try local dishes at nearby restaurants. I believe that this fact has also other pros, for instance, I had a chance to socialize with citizens and look up my English.
What is more, I had a constant contact with English language which was both during classes or sports activities. The teachers were very professional, clearly explained difficult issues. Although they were relaxed and might have seemed cavalier, it helped me effotlessly improve my English skills. I was truly content with this mode of learning and so did others.
I was particularly impressed by how aptly the activities were picked out. Thanks to rock climbing and walking we could marvel picturesque sublimity of nature, widely different than native one. We did not have time to get bored as a result of marvelous organisation.
All in all, what I feel is that I experienced the time of my life. Not only made I new friends but also ameliorated language skills. I trust that my opinion will receive your prompt attention. I look forward hearing from you soon.


Yours faithfully,
XYZ

 
 
 

26 Nov 2014      





Gi2gi
Georgia

I had a quick look at it. The corrections  are given in brackets.
 

I am writing in response to the letter of complaint about the holiday company that has been published in your newspaper. As a participant, I am toally (misprint: totally) opposed to presented view.

To begin with, let me state that I was delighted with the accommodation. In my view, it was not rudimentary or overestaminated, (what�s this?) but neat and tidy with endowment (what do you mean in �endowment"? ) needed. Hotel Staff was obliging and I have no cavil. (�cavil� is mostly used as a verb, consider using �complaint�) ( not sure what you mean in "obliging") Therefore, I believe that the price was appropriate to the quality.

Although the food was not available at the hotel, it gave me great opportunity to try local dishes at nearby restaurants. I believe that this fact has also (consider: also has) other pros, for instance, I had a chance to socialize with citizens and look up my English. (you cannot �look up� your English, �brush up� could be used)

What is more, I had a constant contact with English language  (the English language, article needed) which was both during classes or (�and� would be more appropriate) sports activities. The teachers were very professional, clearly explained difficult issues. Although they were relaxed and might have seemed cavalier, (??? Not sure what you mean) it helped me effotlessly (effortlessly) Improve my English skills. I was truly content with this mode of learning and so did others. (and so were the others)

I was particularly impressed by how aptly the activities were picked out. Thanks to rock climbing and walking we could marvel picturesque sublimity of nature, widely different than native one. (than the native one) We did not have time to get bored as a result of (because of the) marvelous organisation.

All in all, what I feel is that I experienced the time of my life. Not only made I new friends but also (you can use this in an emphatic way like this �not only did I make friends but it also... ) ameliorated language skills. (sounds not natural. Consider using �improved my language skills�) � I trust (�I believe� would be more natural) that my opinion will receive your prompt attention. I look forward hearing from you soon. (�I look forward to hearing�)


--------

P.S. Cheers to Poland from Georgia.  

 

26 Nov 2014     



Myszka
Poland

Many thanks :)

26 Nov 2014     



yanogator
United States

I �ll add a few things. My changes are in red. I agree with Gi2gi �s changes, except the "I believe/I trust" matter near the end.
 
Bruce
 

I am writing in response to the letter of complaint about the holiday company [I don �t know what you mean by "holiday company"] that has been published in your newspaper. As a participant, I am toally (misprint: totally) opposed to the view presented.

To begin with, let me state that I was delighted with the accommodation. In my view, it was not rudimentary or overestaminated, (what’s this?) but neat and tidy with endowment (what do you mean in “endowment"? ) needed. The hotel staff was obliging and I have no cavil. (“cavil” is mostly used as a verb, consider using “complaint”) ( not sure what you mean in "obliging") Therefore, I believe that the price was appropriate to the quality.

Although (omit "the") food was not available at the hotel, it gave me great opportunity to try local dishes at nearby restaurants. I believe that this fact has also (consider: also has) other pros; for instance, I had a chance to socialize with citizens and look up my English. (you cannot “look up” your English, “brush up” could be used)

What is more, I had (omit "a") constant contact with  English language (the English language, article needed) which was both during classes or (“and” would be more appropriate) sports activities. The teachers were very professional and clearly explained difficult issues. Although they were relaxed and might have seemed cavalier, (??? Not sure what you mean) it helped me effotlessly (effortlessly) Improve my English skills. I was truly content with this mode of learning and so did others. (and so were the others)

I was particularly impressed by how aptly the activities were picked out. Thanks to rock climbing and walking we could marvel at the picturesque sublimity (you need a different word here, but I �m not sure exactly what you mean) of nature, widely different than native one. (than the native one) We did not have time to get bored as a result of (because of the) marvelous organisation.

All in all, what I feel is that I experienced the time of my life. Not only made I new friends but also (you can use this in an emphatic way like this “not only did I make friends but it also... ) improved my language skills. (sounds not natural. Consider using “improved my language skills”) … I trust (“I believe” would be more natural) ["I trust" is also common in formal situations] that my opinion will receive your prompt attention. I look forward hearing from you soon. (“I look forward to hearing”)

26 Nov 2014     



Asia teacher
China

There �s a good and free grammar and spelling checker available at http://www.paperrater.com/

26 Nov 2014     



yanogator
United States

Thanks for that website, Asia teacher, but it wasn �t much help here. I pasted the text into it and ran it, and it found only six of the errors we found. It didn �t correct them either; just asked "Did you mean ...?"
 
It seems to be good at what it does, though, so the offer is appreciated.
Bruce

26 Nov 2014