�HETEROTRICHOSIS� is the stage name for a special Magic Illusion, performed in Germany.  (Another famous stage name is �Wells Fargo�, but that�s American).

As a Professional Magician, I have sworn a solemn oath that I will never reveal the secret method of performing any trick to a non-magician.  I never have and I never will.

I did once break my word when I stood on my Scrabble letters, and I�ll admit that I have whispered to my Computer a magic formula, but the calculator was switched off, so it didn�t count.

However, I was in trouble with the Magic Committee when I combined the �Self-Inflating Balloon Trick� with the �Appearing-Bra Trick� and accidentally made a big boob.

So, please, don�t go repeating what I tell you tonight, because it�s confidential.

�Hetero� = �heterosexual�, shortened = male and female, (but now shortened to a very small size).

�Trich� = �trick� (but spoken with a very strong German accent).

�O sis� = �Oh! Sister!� (an American expression very similar to �Oh!  Brother!� but completely different).

�Hetero�  �Trich�  �Oh!  Sis�.

This particular Magic Illusion is performed only in Hamburg, Germany.  A short, beautiful Female Assistant, with red hair and a distinctive striped costume steps into a trunk, which is then locked.  There is a flash of smoke!  Instantly, a tall, thin, ugly Male Assistant, covered in Tomato Sauce, jumps out of the locked trunk.  Fantastic!

What has happened?

A beautiful, shapely girl has been transformed into a long, thin Hamburger.

Les Douglas