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ESL forum >
Message board > @ Jokes day
@ Jokes day
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isa2
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@ Jokes day
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Do you know this one?
Teacher: "You missed school yesterday, didn �t you?"
Pupil: "Not very much!"
Or this one?
When you get to the men`s room, you will see a sign that says, "Gentlemen." Pay no heed to it. Go right on in.
Or this one?
A wife asked her husband to describe her.
He said, �You are A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.�
She said, �What does that mean?�
He said, �Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot�.
She said, �Oh that�s so lovely. What about I, J, K?�
He said, � I�m just kidding!�
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14 Aug 2014
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sarasantos
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 Lol!
Thanks for the funny contribution! ;)
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14 Aug 2014
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isa2
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Enjoy your weekend, dear Sara.
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14 Aug 2014
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douglas
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An old man visited his doctor for help with a problem.
"Doc, I don �t know what �s wrong, but I fart all the time. It �s weird because they are silent and odorless, but they keep coming out. In fact, I �ve farted about 6 times just sitting here. What can I do?"
The doctor replied, "Here, take one of these pills every morning and then come see me in a week."
A week later, the old man came back to the doctor and he was upset. "Doc, those pills didn �t help - they made it worse! I �m still farting, but now they stink something fierce!"
The doctor replied, "Calm down, sir. Now that we �ve cleared your sinuses, we can work on your hearing."
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14 Aug 2014
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douglas
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A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife. He says to the doctor, "Doctor, I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things." "Well," the doctor replied, "go home and tonight stand about 15 feet from her and say something to her. If she doesn �t reply move about 5 feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this so that we �ll get an idea about the severity of her deafness." Sure enough, the husband goes home and does exactly as instructed. He starts off standing about 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen as she is chopping some vegetables and says, "Honey, what �s for dinner?" He hears no response. He moves about 5 feet closer and asks again. No reply. He moves 5 feet closer. Still no reply. He gets fed up and moves right behind her, about an inch away, and asks loudly, "Honey, what �s for dinner?" She replies, "For the fourth time, vegetable stew!" |
14 Aug 2014
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cunliffe
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My �linguistic � jokes.
Why does a Frenchman have only one egg for breakfast? Because that �s enough (pronounced �un oeuf �)
What do you call a Spanish woman with one tooth? Juanita (one eater)
A French cat and an English cat had a race across the English channel. The French cat was called �un deux trois � and the English cat �one two three �. Which cat won the race?
The English cat, of course!!! Because un deux trois cat sank.
Oh dear, hope I don �t get banned! |
14 Aug 2014
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bluedoll
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I can turn you a red indian
How?
See? I told you! How ! |
14 Aug 2014
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