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ESL forum >
Message board > Funny linguistic jokes
Funny linguistic jokes
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cunliffe
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Funny linguistic jokes
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Q: Why can �t you hear a pterodactyl urinate? A: Because the �p � is silent. Any more? |
28 Mar 2015
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jannabanna
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"I �ve just had the most awful time," said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. They gave me hypodermics, and to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by appendectomy." "Wow! How did you pull through?" sympathized his friends. "I don �t know," the boy replied. "Toughest spelling test I ever had." |
28 Mar 2015
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almaz
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So the past and present walk into a bar... It was tense. |
28 Mar 2015
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sarguero
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Which is the longest word in English?
SMILES Because there �s a MILE between S and S |
28 Mar 2015
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Jayho
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If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn�t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed and dry cleaners depressed?
Laundry workers could decrease, eventually becoming depressed and depleted! Even more, bedmakers will be debunked, baseball players will be debased, landscapers will be deflowered, bulldozer operators will be degraded, software engineers will be detested, and even musical composers will eventually decompose. |
28 Mar 2015
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jannabanna
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A childless Canadian couple decided to adopt a Mexican baby. After they got the baby, they decided to enroll in a Spanish class. When asked why, the wife replied, "so that when the baby starts to talk, we �ll be able to understand him." |
28 Mar 2015
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JuliaKaraban
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A little girl: " Mummy, if it �s raining cats and dogs now , so will it be snowing polar bears in winter?"
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28 Mar 2015
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karagozian
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Q : Why does the teacher wear sunglasses? A : Because her/his students are so bright. |
28 Mar 2015
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silvanija
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I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me. |
28 Mar 2015
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Gi2gi
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Why couldn �t a bicycle stand alone? Because it was two tired (or tyred) |
28 Mar 2015
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jannabanna
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I took a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough. |
28 Mar 2015
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