TO "The BRACELET Watch Company"
Dear Sir or Madam,
You have delivered to my house "A Full-size, Replica,�Big Ben London� Watch, complete with Tower".
PLEASE NOTE: I merely ENQUIRED about COSTS, but I did NOT place an ORDER.
Moreover, this time-piece is completely USELESS as a wrist-watch! Why?
You describe yourselves as a Professional Company, yet you have OMITTED to include the WATCH STRAP.
Please, arrange to collect this delivery as soon as possible, for return to your factory. My neighbours are complaining that they cannot enter or leave their homes, and the Police are unable to control the traffic jams, because of the obstruction caused by this Watch.
Please, attend to this matter IMMEDIATELY.
Yours sincerely,
L. Douglas
P.S. I also think that One-hundred-and-fourteen-thousand, Eight-hundred-and-ninety-two-Pounds, and Sixty-seven Pence, (�114,892:67), is a little excessive, for POSTAGE and PACKING!