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ESL forum > Ask for help > Help needed    

Help needed



zvonka.rink
Slovenia

Help needed
 

Hi, dear colleagues,

 
I need your help. I�ve just translated a refrain from a Slovene song for kids which I will need from students from abroad that are visiting us next week. It was a challenge because I needed certain words so that the song can be sung the same way as the original. Here is my English version:
 
I will set off and I will sow (share)
my good will in (with) people�s hearts.
With my right hand the sun is carried,
with the left a golden laugh.
 
Is it OK and does it make any sense?
 
Here is the link to the whole song: 
 
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XViah7DJrM
 
Here is the Slovene refrain:
 
Jaz pa pojdem in zasejem
dobro voljo pri ljudeh.
V eni roki nosim sonce,
v drugi zlati smeh. 
 
 I would really appreciate your comments.
 
Thanks a million.
 
 

13 Mar 2019      





yanogator
United States

Zvonka,
It sounds good, but I would use "In" rather than "With" in the last two lines.
 
Bruce 

13 Mar 2019     



zvonka.rink
Slovenia

Dear Bruce,
thank you so much. You are such a nice person. I wish I could do something for you. 

14 Mar 2019     



yanogator
United States

That�s sweet, Zvonka. You never know when the opportunity might arise.
 
Bruce 

17 Mar 2019     



cunliffe
United Kingdom

Me too! Here it is, Bruce! It�s a nice German goulash and a glass - bottle, if you wish, of the finest red. My apologies if you are a veggie, but I think I�m OK offering you this! Enjoy, as they say in your homeland!
Lynne x 
Edit: Don�t worry if you don�t like mushrooms, and those look pretty fierce! - I�ll have them. Bon appetit!

18 Mar 2019