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ESL forum >
Message board > Rocking the Boat
Rocking the Boat
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maoopa
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Well done Zora,
Just today I got this message when I asked a person who disagreed with me to support their arguments and show me a source and this is what I got:
"Why should we give you a source? Don �t you believe us?"
Best regards to everyone,
Mauro |
21 Jan 2010
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zailda
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I don �t know about the old ESL, since I �ve been here for less than a year.
But what I see is that the site is growing day by day, and we have to face it: changes happen. Some are welcomed and others disturb us. But we have to adapt to the new reality: we are almost 300.000 members - or so, and changes are necessary.
Some of us won �t adapt to the changes, and will leave - it �s a fact, as we have lost some already. And as in any family around the world, we love each other, we support each other, we have good and bad moments. There �s a time to share good feelings and a time to discuss disturbing events.
Running away from matters and pretending they don �t exist - for the mere fact that we refrain from discussing them - won �t make them disappear. We are adults and if sometimes we have disputes and hard discussions on the forum or on the reporting page - as someone quoted today - we are humans and it �s part of the human nature to fight for what they believe in.
As it happens to be in any family, we fight and sometimes not in the nicest way (and who doesn �t when at home?) but we do appreciate each other �s job and collaboration.
I don �t see the "bad atmosphere" as a bad thing at all. It �s part of the growing process, and if we want to make a wonderful cake, we have to abide with some eggs being broken.
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21 Jan 2010
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zailda
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@maoopa - are you willing to re-start that discussion about advertizing?
Is your comment here to say you agree with Zora and will do your best to keep the site �s �good atmosphere" or to set fire to an old discussion?
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21 Jan 2010
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Bruna Dutra
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Hello, our righteous knight Zora and all!! I �m baaack!!! And of course, I could not NOT reply to your thread!! I guess I could post only this  and that �d be enough.
I guess people could say that I started a �fuss � and went away, but I was really away.
I have not been a member of Eslp. for suuuuch a long time (6, 7 months
I guess) but I have been able to see it changing. Does it have
something to do with the AFS case?! Because I don �t know if you agree
or if I really right or not, but I guess we could say that after that,
we became a little more afraid of the so-called "thieves". And after
that, we have been seing thieves where I guess we did not before.
I myself have posted threads like "is this really fair", or "should
this be allowed", but only afterwards I learned that the site has only
one admistrator who could answer that question, and for obvious reasons
he cannot be omnipresent/omniscient of everything that goes in here.
Therefore, moderators have been ruling as a jury, yes. If for a case they can �t say the proper law/rule, they express their
opinion and others agree/disagree. As an advocacy enthusiast, I can
certainly say that we have too many "lawyers" for just one
judge/legislator, and if Victor does read this, I REALLY HOPE he does
not get me wrong, I admire his work tremendously, and I think he has
helped more people than I ever will in my whole life. I have already
written him about just HOW MUCH I care for his work.
And also IMHO, that is when such problems are brought to the community, when the moderators fell there �s something wrong but can �t do much about it. That �s why we have so many nasty threads, that are nowhere nice for the site �s mood. How far does moderating go?! That is certainly not clear.
Victor is a man and the site �s creator. In here, as the only administrator, he �s God, and I say that without any flattery (I was told this exact expression from another moderator), I haven �t yet talked to him or heard his opinion over the many discussions that have been raised regarding the power of the moderators and the mood on the site, however, until I do, I will stop trying to raise these matters, not because I think we all shouldn �t but because so far, it has been pointless (again, not my opinion, the same moderator told me that discussing this in the forum is pointless, only Victor can rule over controversial cases/opinions).
Wow.... I have talked a lot, but it �s because I was away for a while, and I really like talking with the friends I �ve made in here and also about this website that I have come to love so much. But, again, how much can we do about it?
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21 Jan 2010
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Sonn
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OMG, zailda! What are you talking about?! Natural selection or what?! Why do you need fighting HERE? Don �t you have enough of it in real life? All people want to find a place where they can forget about the problems for a while. It �s not escaping, it �s relaxing. Moreover, it �s NATURAL (any psychologist will prove it) . I am here from november 2008 and I remember the old ESL Printables. It helped me every day and gave me strength to go on, inspired me and was a sourse of good mood. And I don �t want to lose it. And I don �t want to fight with people. All I want is to share and to exchange experience with other teachers, to learn something new, to practise English. I think I am not the only one! |
21 Jan 2010
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zailda
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@Sonn, I �m not fighting, just giving my opinion.
Can�t you give yours without criticizing mine, please?
Criticism is something that doesn�t contribute for the "good atmosphere" at all.
Can I - please - express my opinion?
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21 Jan 2010
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Sonn
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zailda, I �m sorry, but I can �t say you are not fightining according to your recent replies on some threads. Your wss are great, your advice are helpful, and I think you are a nice and a strong-willed person. But please, try to be a bit more tolerant. The way you sometimes prove you opinion may hurt other people �s feelings. Not all of us are as strong as you are. |
21 Jan 2010
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zailda
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We should be strong to survive loads of criticism and people against us for no aparent reason. I replied the threads in the same way they are; if people are nice, I �m nice too. If they are not nice at all, what do you expect from me?
People who don �t want to be hurt by other person �s comments should think twice before attacking them first. In my country we say: don �t tease who is quiet.
I was quiet and when I logged in today I saw a thread about me, many people ruling about what my behavior should be... WOW! How important person I am, even when I am calmly sleeping at home, there are others deciding on my behavior and telling what I should have done!
I haven �t noticed that I was worthy of too much attention from other members. Maybe other people have feelings to be hurt and I don �t. But if someone wants to criticize me openly, he has to be strong enough to stand from his words, and not attack and them claim about hurt feelings. I �ve never hurt person �s feelings if they didn �t try to do it first. And I �m not Jesus, I won �t give the other side of my face.
Maybe you �re right, I should be more tolerant, more mature (as someone quoted today). But is it your matter? Besides telling people how they have to behavior on the forum, they also want to tell me how should I be as a person? Isn �t it too much interference in my particular feelings and way of being?
Is there a "character" pattern to be ESL Printables member? It seems a person should be nice, helpful, calm, tolerant, patient, friendly, cautious with other person �s feelings... what else? Did I miss something?
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21 Jan 2010
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Sonn
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zailda, I �m typing you a pm now. |
21 Jan 2010
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zailda
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The interesting part is that you �re saying that cases where we can do nothing are to be reported to Victor; and so did we. A thread about another kind of unfair behavior is not considered worthy of being posted on the forum, but people remarking my behavior is considered OK.
Why? Isn �t it too personal to be treated on the forum? People who claim I reacted strongly (because I was pushed on the forum) should have sent me a PM, if they think my behavior was not OK.
When people start a thread just to attack a particular member, is it nice? Should it be replied in a nice manner? Should I be aware of their feelings?
And the question is: what is the aim of starting threads just to remark someone in particular? Does it contribute for the site "good atmosphere"?
People claim they are very concerned on the sites good atmosphere and say it in a thread that remarks another member personally! Is it coherent?
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21 Jan 2010
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